Motivation

Be motivated today! Live better tomorrow!

Party season. You better be ready.

Before I go into party season outfits, I have to tell you guys about a very memorable day in my life! (I can't even believe I am writing about this), it wasn't funny at the time but now I can laugh about it so read on. So on this fateful day I decided to book in to get a bikini wax, this is something I usually do only when I am going on holiday but every now and then I connect instantly and strongly with my inner feminine Aphrodite and decide that body hair is not for me and my goddess status *rolls eyes* 😂. Anyway back to my bikini wax, I booked a place close to work because that was the only spare time I had, my weekend was going to be full on and the beauty spa close to home shuts at 6pm so there was no way to make it home and to the spa in time. I called this place near work and booked a lunch time slot, the beautician assured me that we would be done in 30 to 40 minutes, "SIGN ME UP" I hollered, Sign me UP! I got to the spa on time with 5 minutes to spare and I was feeling very proud of myself. The beautician introduced herself as Angela and we went straight in without hesitation. Angela was nice, she smiled at me sensing a kind of nervousness energy around me. I have a hate hate relationship with bikini waxing, I cannot stand the pain, my pain threshold is so low that one time in the middle of a wax the beautician asked me how I gave birth to a child when I can't even bear a wax 😂😂. First of all thunder faya you for that statement, I had epidural nicca! Angela on the other hand was gentle, she didn't judge me, she just told me to relax and everything was going to be just fine. Until she ripped the first strip off, it was so painful that I saw stars. I was now convinced Angela was the devil! The devil came in like a thief in the night and I had no clue. Tears filled my eyes then I told myself " I have been through child birth so be strong and soldier on" the second strip ripped and the sound kept playing in my head, I looked at Angela, she was avoiding eye contact because remember she is the devil at this point and I am a child of God so she cannot even look me in the eye 😂. Then the most unexpected thing happens, my phone alarm rings and this puzzles me, I only have a wake up alarm at 5am so why is my alarm blaring at 1.25pm. I pick it up to see what it was and it was a teleconference meeting I was meant to be hosting at work at 1.30pm. At this time I had tears in my eyes, the devil is giving me a wax job and now I have to deal with a teleconference call. What do I do? "Angela" I screamed. Please excuse me from the room for half an hour so I can make this call. Angela, the she devil that she is said with the most beautiful smile "I am sorry but I have a client after you and I am fully booked the rest of the day. I had a decision to make pipo! Do I carry on? Or do I walk out of that place like a spoilt 5 year old who only gets half a haircut after screaming the barber's to the floor. I WAS GOING TO SOLDIER ON! I start to dail the number of my teleconference meeting when a third rip caused me to almost throw my phone to the wall, Angela and I are having a full domestic situation now, I just wanted to break up with her forever and ever and never see her again. I started the call as professional as possible. Hello Alero here, who else is on the phone *introductions were being made* and as I opened my mouth to continue chairing the meeting, Angela give me a thumbs up to either say I was doing well or thumbs up to finish me off like a gladiators in the colosseum begging for their lives , I couldn't tell. Before I could give her a nod in agreement, she rips again and at this point I accepted my fate. Angela is not stopping this assault and I am not stopping this call, it was a battle of wills now. While I was so sure I had internal bleeding at this point, I was ready for Angela in a way she never thought possible. The more pain I felt, the more I spoke to forget my pain and most of all to shame the devil 😂😂😂. Ten minutes or so into the call (like I was counting 🙄), the ordeal was over. Angela sprayed baby powder all over the place like an artist putting finishing touches to her life's work. She gave me another smile of which I was tempted to give her the middle finger but I resisted, and then she then mouthed "take all the time you want", what a beesh! This wasn't the story you told me when I begged for some alone time 15 minutes ago. I lay there evaluating the ordeal. I felt half victory and half defeat, and most of all I felt exhausted mentally and physically. I wanted to go home and curl up in a ball and have a good 8 hours of sleep. I stepped out of the room and Angela stood there smiling, she has a story to tell her colleagues but this time her Angelic face had returned because I realised that she had to do what she had to do. I even had strange feelings that everything she did was for my own good. Angela was forgiven and even tipped to my amazement 😂. I strolled in the office searching faces for any inclination the ordeal I had in a small white room in the spa was somehow known to colleagues. Everyone went about their business as normal and then the real victory dance set in. I pulled it off pipo. Angela and I pulled it off, we were back together and no teleconference can keep us apart. End of story 😂. Ok steady on. Before you piss yourselves laughing remember party season is upon us. What will you be wearing. Be quick to make your purchases because every party dress I had my eye on were all sold out in my size. So I've had to improvise and making things work by pairing pieces together. When I went on my hunt, I was looking for specific items like -Sequin -Popping colours -Textures like leather and feathers -Separates What I was not looking for (but would have loved) -Dresses , especially ones that are difficult to wear again -Too distinct designs So this look is one that I wanted to be party popping but modest at the same time, the type that you would wear to your child's school Christmas party or an office party.  I paired this gorgeous sequin skirt from missguided with a leather crop too and Top shop blazer. I threw on the blazer just to make the outfit more modest. The good thing about it was I can wear all these pieces separately with other outfits hence my preference for separates over dresses. I have put together some looks below that would be perfect for any party this festive season. Be sure to get the best deals , many online shops do 20 to 30 percent off very often. Look 1- Tomboy chic Boohoo Black fur coat Boohoo Sequin trousers Asos Leather bralet Boohoo embellished shoes Look 2- Relaxed chic Missguuded Pink sequin skirt Moon river White sweater Asos Blue heels Ted baker clutch bag Look 3- Preppy and pretty Closet London full skirt  Asos Black top Vivien Westwood  shoes Urban code fur scarf Look number 4- Statement Chic Missguided Orange dress (currently 50% off) Black fur booties Blue banana Clutch Asos Earrings Comment below on your best look 1, 2, 3 or 4. Make sure you go out there and salt this festive period. Until next time my buttercups.

Best of the black Friday sales plus strategies to apply when shopping 

Ok guys black Friday shopping is here. I don't know exactly when this became a thing in the UK but we are not complaining, let's go for it.  Quick strategies to apply to your black Friday shopping. First of all don't feel under pressure to buy anything especially things you don't need. If you get one or two deals, take it as a victory. Many shops have decided not to do black Friday sales because it dilutes the usual boxing day sales revenues. I say these deals will be available after Christmas so put no pressure on yourself to bag deals.  Strategy number 1. Buy some of your christmas presents to save money. I usually buy some of my Christmas presents in the black Friday sale because the other major sale is after Christmas where the deals are no longer relevant to me. Strategy number 2. Buy investment pieces and things you will wear for a long time like coats and boots. I have Ralph Lauren coats I bought 7 years ago that I wear till this day.  Strategy number 3. Add things to your basket and don't buy immediately, shop around and see what is out there. If you come back to the basket it means you really like the item so go for it. Strategy number 4. Find shops that do a discount off the entire shop. Some brands are doing selected items only, chances are that what you really want will not be in the selection and it might either make you buy it at full price and regret it if it goes in the boxing day sale.  Strategy number 5. Don't spend spend spend like there is no tomorrow. My birthday is in a little over a week, you need to save up for my pressie if you haven't done so already lol. See below for some really good deals I have dug up from far and wide. Enjoy..   One sleeve maxi dress from AQ AQ Here Sweater dress with fur sleeve also from AQ AQ Here  Orange is the new black. Jumpsuit also from AS here  Ego black boots 50 percent off Kurt Geiger shoes 20% off (pure arrogance) Also from Kurt Geiger these pink beauties  Mango 30% off everything  Check out this structured blazer  Winter florals. Dress also from Mango These orange babies give me life 😂 Pick your colour. These are a perfect run around bag. I just love it  Amazon fashion. Who knew about this best kept secret  Check office coat. I love  Is this watch cool or what. From Amazon. 80% off Warehouse is doing 30% off everything. Pick up this tweed beauty here  Hurry. Get your long term investment pieces like coats and boots like I said. Until next time Buttercups.

How do I make you FEEL?

Monday. Tonnes of sweets, a mountain of cake and two parties later for my baby boy, I am sitting on the spinning bike wondering how my diet went so wrong in the last few days. That aside, we had a great karate themed party on Saturday, Jax was beaming from ear to ear and was so happy to have his friends celebrate with him.   We also had a great party entertainer who made Jax feel very special all day long. He made his friends tickle him when he wasn't smiling for a second, he chose him first for all the games, he brought him on stage multiple times and made Jax the centre of all his entertainment acts. Jax couldn't stop taking about him all weekend. I sat and thought, this entertainer has stamped a lasting impression on a little 6 year old boy in just two hours. What he do? He made Jax feel special with little effort because that is what he does. So the big question is  HOW DO YOU MAKE PEOPLE FEEL? I am not asking if you go around trying to please people just to make them feel special. No. What I am asking is when you go about your day, do you think of your actions in terms of  - will it make the other person feel good or bad? I use the word "feel" because although we have little control of how another person feels, we have a general idea. Action and consequences often come to mind.  Are my actions going to affect a person positively or negatively? I love this Buddhist prayer that I say before leaving the house for the day "As I go out,  may I not cause anyone hurt and pain" This is powerful because pain causes more pain. A person who has a terrible commute because they had an argument with someone with a rotten attitude, will unconsciously transfer this hurt to work colleagues or family members. It is a snowball effect guys. As we start a new week, please be conscious of other people's feelings. A nasty person has gone through things that have made them that way, trust me when I say it has  NOTHING to do with you, the attitude came long before you, shake it off and move on, no one gets a medal for winning an argument or speaking 235 words a minute. I am feeling very reflective this time of the year as is typical when my birthday is round the corner whoop! whoop!! Watch this space. About this outfit  Coat- TK Maxx similar here  Jeans- New look similar here  Boots Ego.co.uk here  Have a lovely week guys. Until next time  Buttercups.  

You don’t have to be in the competition 

...is what my son said to me when we were up in late hours desperately trying to finish a "voluntary" bug project competition he was asked to join by his teacher. At first I got a bit annoyed and irritated by the comment, does this young man know that every job interview he will attend, every auction, every contract bid in life is a competition? After my brief moment, I put myself together and realised he doesn't know better so my job as a parent is  to educate  him about competition and the real world. As a child I was never competitive. I always scored in the top three in my class in academics and I was very sporty and musical. I was an all rounder and didn't think I needed to be competitive to prove anything to anyone. It was thesame in high school, I did well in academics, my social life and also excelled in sports. These periods built my self confidence, I knew who I was and was highly secure in myself,  that was until I applied for my first job at 16 and was rejected. Its funny because I thought my performance at the interview was great and  could only be compared to an Executive director with 30 years of experience in the banking industry, you know, confident, cocky, god like with a sprinkle of humour all at the same time. I was absolutely shocked when I was told a resounding “NO” and I thought "do they know who I am?", "every other company in this industry want me, but I want you" (shelf stacking industry that is, its a thing I can assure you) 😂.  Then I began to see all the competition around me, in university when you leave the library at 9pm to go home and see your course mates sipping on a freshly made brew,  just settling in for a night of studying. When people borrowed books strategically just to ensure other people and groups never have access to the books for key projects and assignments. When people do everything to be the lecturers pet just to get ahead in grades. I saw all of these happening and thought, I am going to peel my layers to reveal my competitive side, game on! My relationship with competitive people in the past have been very dicey, I found over competitive people unattractive for friendships, I didnt want to hide successes from friends because I think it will make them unhappy or jealous of my success. I never wanted to develop a complex because of people who strive to be better than the next. I stayed away! But as years roll by you ask yourself "How are you a judge of competitiveness all of a sudden?", "who appointed you the leader of the yardstick in which competitiveness is measured?" Now when I meet such people , I draw them close, I want them to guide me in something that is not inherent in me. I dread the thought of being left behind so I use them as a sharpening tool, to keep me in check and show me the trail, why not? So you can understand my sadness in seeing my son, the most confident child on earth, talented all round taking the same steps as me in not being a competitor. After he told me he didn't have to enter the competition because it wasn't compulsory, I sat him down and told him if he wanted to excel then he has to compete, compete with course mates, industry peers, the next candidate and most importantly himself! But he must always remember to stay in his path and not do anything that felt like it was taking him away from what he wad destined for. If you are not in it to win it you will never get the prize. Monday motivation. I hope we help our children realise this important life lesson.  That reminds me, off to play the lottery guys, wish me luck 😂 About this outfit This was a fun outfit for  me to play around with, monochrome with a splash of red. Although I was compared to a Flamenco dancer, I didn't care because I absolutely loved it. Earrings Asos (old). I found these cute pair on etsy (oh I love etsy).  Hat is from TK Sale  Top was  on sale in Very but unfortunately they are out of stock Shoes here  Until next time Buttercups. Go out there and get it 

What does underwear mean to you?

It was about 6.30pm on a Wednesday evening, I was on a packed train from Oxford circus just trying to survive the rush hour of sweaty pits and bacteria so big you could kill them like mosquitos by slapping your palms together. It was a regular ole evening with regular ole passengers until suddenly the crowd started to part like the Red sea. A beautiful, slim, brown skin girl with thick curly hair walks in with such aura and confidence that I had immediate self esteem issues and my negative self (lets call her Halle Berry) started talking to my real self (call this one Beyonce) and it went a bit like this   Halle Berry: When I told you not to eat calories today you thought I was joking BeyoncĂ©: *praying against 3000 calories borrowed from the next week* Halle Berry: See yourself? Unrepentant beesh ? Back to the train. I realised one of the reasons why the crowd parted for her was because she was like a goddess that graced us mere mortals with her presence on the Victoria line and partly  because she had three big bags of Ann  Summers and Victoria secret. Now things began to make sense to me, this goddess had an active sex life and wasn't afraid to show it. I got thinking about underwear. How many of you in long term relationships now see underwear as a basic human right not something for your other half to get some enjoyment from. When I go to the shop to purchase underwear, I give it the most vigorous stretch test that even a 500 year old Egyptian  mummy would be so proud of my attention to detail of elasticity. I want to know if it will stand the test of time. I talk to the underwear, telling them of the "Family 5 year plan" (you are part of us now forever so I need to do my due diligence). I spend hours looking at reviews of the newest most comfortable bras with air lite technology but bras like that look like they were designed by the Church of Seventh day adventists. Why does it have to be so? Why cant we have comfort and sexy? Or Why can't I be the one who does underwear shopping like it is a hobby not a chore? Pick out pieces for an Egyptian princess not a mummy? Choose style over comfort and strut with the bags on the tube unapologetically.  I really don't have the answers, I may have to get back to you on this one because I was rudely interrupted by the sale alarm I put online for "the it bra for mums sold over 200 in Madagascar alone" sigh. That day  after the train goddess encounter I got so triggered that I went online for a good ole shopping experience for underwear, one I have never embarked on before but firmly shut my laptop because I just couldnt go through with it. I need comfort too so I am on a mission to find a brand that does both and subsequently boost their profits by 25%. If you know of this mythical brand please let me know, I don't want a repeat of walking PAST Victoria Secret with hubby where he pushed me inside so hard that I got severe whiplash and a concussion ?. Help me pipo I need to find that brand. Please comment below. About this outfit  I saw these boots at public desire in March/April this year. I had seen the Balenciaga version and thought no difference, I will get them. Two days Later, sold out! I couldn't believe my eyes. I cried (there was some wailing too), then I opened the bible to give me verses on strength. I was on the phone to public desire and was put on a waiting list (when you are not Chanel or Hermes) but you are affordable so God is good all the time ?. Finally in August I got a shipment, I passed out when I saw the long package and knew exactly what it was. Unfortunately these are sold out so you can get an alternative here  Blazer- Hubbys closet ? Charles Trywitt blazer Skirt Zara (old) Until next time Buttercups. Don't forget to drop a comment below.

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