Their time is UP!

When I heard that women were going to wear all black to the 75th Golden globes as a protest against sexual harassment and as a stand of solidarity with women who have spoken out and will speak out. I thought ok maybe a handful of people will wear black because at the end of the day no one wants intentionally commit career suicide especially in Hollywood. I didn't expect what I saw next, the red carpet filled with a sea of black, I was shocked. Glued to the TV with heavy eyes watching history unfold, finally people will stand up and listen, at last women have a voice on a big stage. Oprah made a compelling speech which I have lifted parts from CNN.com. her punchline? "THEIR TIME IS UP!" For men who use their position of power to sexually harass women, their time is UP! See below for Oprah's speech after collecting their awards and then the best and worst dressed of the night. "I want to thank the Hollywood Foreign Press Association because we all know the press is under siege these days. We also know it's the insatiable dedication to uncovering the absolute truth that keeps us from turning a blind eye to corruption and to injustice. To -- to tyrants and victims, and secrets and lies. I want to say that I value the press more than ever before as we try to navigate these complicated times, which brings me to this: what I know for sure is that speaking your truth is the most powerful tool we all have. And I'm especially proud and inspired by all the women who have felt strong enough and empowered enough to speak up and share their personal stories. Each of us in this room are celebrated because of the stories that we tell, and this year we became the story. But it's not just a story affecting the entertainment industry. It's one that transcends any culture, geography, race, religion, politics, or workplace. So I want tonight to express gratitude to all the women who have endured years of abuse and assault because they, like my mother, had children to feed and bills to pay and dreams to pursue. They're the women whose names we'll never know. They are domestic workers and farm workers. They are working in factories and they work in restaurants and they're in academia, engineering, medicine, and science. They're part of the world of tech and politics and business. They're our athletes in the Olympics and they're our soldiers in the military. And there's someone else, Recy Taylor, a name I know and I think you should know, too. In 1944, Recy Taylor was a young wife and mother walking home from a church service she'd attended in Abbeville, Alabama, when she was abducted by six armed white men, raped, and left blindfolded by the side of the road coming home from church. They threatened to kill her if she ever told anyone, but her story was reported to the NAACP where a young worker by the name of Rosa Parks became the lead investigator on her case and together they sought justice. But justice wasn't an option in the era of Jim Crow. The men who tried to destroy her were never persecuted. Recy Taylor died ten days ago, just shy of her 98th birthday. She lived as we all have lived, too many years in a culture broken by brutally powerful men. For too long, women have not been heard or believed if they dare speak the truth to the power of those men. But their time is up. Their time is up. Their time is up. And I just hope -- I just hope that Recy Taylor died knowing that her truth, like the truth of so many other women who were tormented in those years, and even now tormented, goes marching on. It was somewhere in Rosa Parks' heart almost 11 years later, when she made the decision to stay seated on that bus in Montgomery, and it's here with every woman who chooses to say, "Me too." And every man -- every man who chooses to listen." Now for the best dressed. And the worst dressed? You guessed it, all the women who couldn't be bothered to wear black and most especially the men who arrogantly wore their status quo regular tuxedos... THUNDER is coming for you šŸ˜‚. I especially commend the men who were brave enough to wear all black, I am not talking about men who threw on a regular tuxedo, I mean men who risked the live rounds of the fashion police and wore black shirts and black ties with their suits. Justin Timberlake, Chris Hemsworth and Ricky Martin we see you. For the very young cast of Stranger things, you are the future, you are doing well, don't let anyone corrupt your young minds, thank you for wearing black and joining the revolution. And lastly to Sharon Stone who brought her son to the red carpet to witness this revolution, you are the real MVP. Mothers, we hold the future of the world in our hands, teach your sons that sexual harassment is NOT OK! Let's go forth this week and remember what just happened at the 75th Golden Globes. Until next time buttercups.

How I teach my son about giving

Christmas time is a very joyful time for many people but there are people that feel the loneliest during this time especially the elderly and homeless. There are also people in the world being displaced, and living in fear everyday because of wars, injustice, persecution. While charity work is all year round, it is a good practice to use the opportunity of Christmas to teach kids about giving. Growing up, my mum was always involved with charities. She would say "charity wipes away a multitude of sin", I never understood that until recently. When you are focused on giving with grace and doing good, there is no room for evil to lurk in your mind. Good and evil cannot live in the same place at the same time. I grew up going to St Vincent de Paul society meetings with my mum who is dedicated to helping the poor. I learnt to be charitable mostly by seeing her charity.Ā  Today it is easy for our children to beĀ  so shielded from the suffering of others that they become oblivious to the realities around them so I am making a conscious effort to teach my 6 year old about doing good and giving. And how do I do this? Here are some ways: 1. We went through his old toys for donation to our local hospital. I didn't just want him to give away toys he doesn'tĀ  care for, I nudged himĀ  to give toys he struggled to let go of, with encouraging words like " can you imagine how happy that will make another child? " or "you are going to make another child's Christmas so joyful". Giving is about sacrifice, not only when it is convenient and it is a valuable lesson for kids. 2. I gave him the honour of giving our neighbours their Christmas cards and chocolates. Of course toĀ  reinforce the message of giving and not just receiving during the Holiday. I also reminded him of the joy he would bring to our neighbours by giving them chocolate, of which he replied "but they are on a diet"šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚. But the message was there and loud and clear. 3. We are currently in the planning stages of gifts he is going to make for family members, since he gat no job (Fada lawd please bless him with a job in 2018šŸ˜‚). I have bought supplies for hand made cardsĀ  papier mache jewellery boxes, candy necklaces, decorated picture frames and decorated vases. He will work just like the elves are working very hard to bring him his pressies. It's all in the spirit of giving. 4. We always pray for children around the world who have less than we do. So he will write a letter to them and make a card wishing themĀ  a Merry Christmas which I will put some money in and send it off on his behalf. 5. Lastly, as part of his schools charitable deeds, each pupilĀ  packs a shoe box with little toys, sanitary goods, cosmetics and stationery. I involve him in the preparations and make up two shoe boxes rather than the required one. He helps with picking and the wrapping of the goods. These are just the little things that pass on my passion for good and helping others at this festive time. I hope this helps for people who just don't know where to start teaching kids about giving. SuggestionsĀ  on giving this Christmas Shoe box appeal is still going, it is never too late. See below the Samaritan's site and put in your post code to find your nearest drop off point. https://www.samaritans-purse.org.uk/what-we-do/operation-christmas-child/what-goes-in-my-shoebox/ I usually go to the pound shop and stock a box with 1. Toothpaste 2. Toothbrush 3. Colouring pens 4. Pack of pencils 5. Small book 6. Deodorant spray 7. Small toy 8. Small toy 9. Small toy 10. Small toy All cost Ā£10. I do a boy themed and girl themed box and wrap it nicely in a Christmas themed wrapping paper. CRISIS and CENTRE POINT These are very close to my heart. They are both homeless charities who take homeless people off the streets for the holidays (9 days), they provide them with meals, Christmas Turkey, sanitation and a health check all for Ā£26 per person. Follow CRISIS linkĀ hereĀ or Center point for homeless young peopleĀ here GIVE BLOOD Giving blood is always a good idea. The question I always pose to people when they are hesitant is "If you or your child needed blood, would you be grateful to get what you need?". If yes then give blood there is really no question. ClickĀ linkĀ for your nearest center. Spread the love and be kind this season and always. Until next time buttercups

Party season. You better be ready.

Before I go into party season outfits, I have to tell you guys about a very memorable day in my life! (I can't even believe I am writing about this), it wasn't funny at the time but now I can laugh about it so read on. So on this fateful day I decided to book in to get a bikini wax, this is something I usually do only when I am going on holiday but every now and then I connect instantly and strongly with my inner feminine Aphrodite and decide that body hair is not for me and my goddess status *rolls eyes* šŸ˜‚. Anyway back to my bikini wax, I booked a place close to work because that was the only spare time I had, my weekend was going to be full on and the beauty spa close to home shuts at 6pm so there was no way to make it home and to the spa in time. I called this place near work and booked a lunch time slot, the beautician assured me that we would be done in 30 to 40 minutes, "SIGN ME UP" I hollered, Sign me UP! I got to the spa on time with 5 minutes to spare and I was feeling very proud of myself. The beautician introduced herself as Angela and we went straight in without hesitation. Angela was nice, she smiled at me sensing a kind of nervousness energy around me. I have a hate hate relationship with bikini waxing, I cannot stand the pain, my pain threshold is so low that one time in the middle of a wax the beautician asked me how I gave birth to a child when I can't even bear a wax šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚. First of all thunder faya you for that statement, I had epidural nicca! Angela on the other hand was gentle, she didn't judge me, she just told me to relax and everything was going to be just fine. Until she ripped the first strip off, it was so painful that I saw stars. I was now convinced Angela was the devil! The devil came in like a thief in the night and I had no clue. Tears filled my eyes then I told myself " I have been through child birth so be strong and soldier on" the second strip ripped and the sound kept playing in my head, I looked at Angela, she was avoiding eye contact because remember she is the devil at this point and I am a child of God so she cannot even look me in the eye šŸ˜‚. Then the most unexpected thing happens, my phone alarm rings and this puzzles me, I only have a wake up alarm at 5am so why is my alarm blaring at 1.25pm. I pick it up to see what it was and it was a teleconference meeting I was meant to be hosting at work at 1.30pm. At this time I had tears in my eyes, the devil is giving me a wax job and now I have to deal with a teleconference call. What do I do? "Angela" I screamed. Please excuse me from the room for half an hour so I can make this call. Angela, the she devil that she is said with the most beautiful smile "I am sorry but I have a client after you and I am fully booked the rest of the day. I had a decision to make pipo! Do I carry on? Or do I walk out of that place like a spoilt 5 year old who only gets half a haircut after screaming the barber's to the floor. I WAS GOING TO SOLDIER ON! I start to dail the number of my teleconference meeting when a third rip caused me to almost throw my phone to the wall, Angela and I are having a full domestic situation now, I just wanted to break up with her forever and ever and never see her again. I started the call as professional as possible. Hello Alero here, who else is on the phone *introductions were being made* and as I opened my mouth to continue chairing the meeting, Angela give me a thumbs up to either say I was doing well or thumbs up to finish me off like a gladiators in the colosseum begging for their lives , I couldn't tell. Before I could give her a nod in agreement, she rips again and at this point I accepted my fate. Angela is not stopping this assault and I am not stopping this call, it was a battle of wills now. While I was so sure I had internal bleeding at this point, I was ready for Angela in a way she never thought possible. The more pain I felt, the more I spoke to forget my pain and most of all to shame the devil šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚. Ten minutes or so into the call (like I was counting šŸ™„), the ordeal was over. Angela sprayed baby powder all over the place like an artist putting finishing touches to her life's work. She gave me another smile of which I was tempted to give her the middle finger but I resisted, and then she then mouthed "take all the time you want", what a beesh! This wasn't the story you told me when I begged for some alone time 15 minutes ago. I lay there evaluating the ordeal. I felt half victory and half defeat, and most of all I felt exhausted mentally and physically. I wanted to go home and curl up in a ball and have a good 8 hours of sleep. I stepped out of the room and Angela stood there smiling, she has a story to tell her colleagues but this time her Angelic face had returned because I realised that she had to do what she had to do. I even had strange feelings that everything she did was for my own good. Angela was forgiven and even tipped to my amazement šŸ˜‚. I strolled in the office searching faces for any inclination the ordeal I had in a small white room in the spa was somehow known to colleagues. Everyone went about their business as normal and then the real victory dance set in. I pulled it off pipo. Angela and I pulled it off, we were back together and no teleconference can keep us apart. End of story šŸ˜‚. Ok steady on. Before you piss yourselves laughing remember party season is upon us. What will you be wearing. Be quick to make your purchases because every party dress I had my eye on were all sold out in my size. So I've had to improvise and making things work by pairing pieces together. When I went on my hunt, I was looking for specific items like -Sequin -Popping colours -Textures like leather and feathers -Separates What I was not looking for (but would have loved) -Dresses , especially ones that are difficult to wear again -Too distinct designs So this look is one that I wanted to be party popping but modest at the same time, the type that you would wear to your child's school Christmas party or an office party.Ā  I paired this gorgeous sequin skirt from missguided with a leather crop too and Top shop blazer. I threw on the blazer just to make the outfit more modest. The good thing about it was I can wear all these pieces separately with other outfits hence my preference for separates over dresses. I have put together some looks below that would be perfect for any party this festive season. Be sure to get the best deals , many online shops do 20 to 30 percent off very often. Look 1- Tomboy chic BoohooĀ Black furĀ coat BoohooĀ SequinĀ trousers AsosĀ Leather bralet BoohooĀ embellished shoes Look 2- Relaxed chic MissguudedĀ Pink sequinĀ skirt Moon riverĀ White sweater AsosĀ Blue heels Ted bakerĀ clutch bag Look 3- Preppy and pretty Closet LondonĀ full skirtĀ  AsosĀ Black top Vivien WestwoodĀ Ā shoes Urban codeĀ fur scarf Look number 4- Statement Chic MissguidedĀ Orange dressĀ (currently 50% off) BlackĀ fur booties Blue bananaĀ Clutch AsosĀ Earrings Comment below on your best look 1, 2, 3 or 4. Make sure you go out there and salt this festive period. Until next time my buttercups.

Best of the black Friday sales plus strategies to apply when shoppingĀ 

Ok guys black Friday shopping is here. I don't know exactly when this became a thing in the UK but we are not complaining, let's go for it.  Quick strategies to apply to your black Friday shopping. First of all don't feel under pressure to buy anything especially things you don't need. If you get one or two deals, take it as a victory. Many shops have decided not to do black Friday sales because it dilutes the usual boxing day sales revenues. I say these deals will be available after Christmas so put no pressure on yourself to bag deals.  Strategy number 1. Buy some of your christmas presents to save money. I usually buy some of my Christmas presents in the black Friday sale because the other major sale is after Christmas where the deals are no longer relevant to me. Strategy number 2. Buy investment pieces and things you will wear for a long time like coats and boots. I have Ralph Lauren coats I bought 7 years ago that I wear till this day.  Strategy number 3. Add things to your basket and don't buy immediately, shop around and see what is out there. If you come back to the basket it means you really like the item so go for it. Strategy number 4. Find shops that do a discount off the entire shop. Some brands are doing selected items only, chances are that what you really want will not be in the selection and it might either make you buy it at full price and regret it if it goes in the boxing day sale.  Strategy number 5. Don't spend spend spend like there is no tomorrow. My birthday is in a little over a week, you need to save up for my pressie if you haven't done so already lol. See below for some really good deals I have dug up from far and wide. Enjoy..   One sleeve maxi dress from AQ AQ Here Sweater dress with fur sleeve also from AQ AQ Here  Orange is the new black. Jumpsuit also from AS here  Ego black boots 50 percent off Kurt Geiger shoes 20% off (pure arrogance) Also from Kurt Geiger these pink beauties  Mango 30% off everything  Check out this structured blazer  Winter florals. Dress also from Mango These orange babies give me life šŸ˜‚ Pick your colour. These are a perfect run around bag. I just love it  Amazon fashion. Who knew about this best kept secret  Check office coat. I love  Is this watch cool or what. From Amazon. 80% off Warehouse is doing 30% off everything. Pick up this tweed beauty here  Hurry. Get your long term investment pieces like coats and boots like I said. Until next time Buttercups.

How do I make you FEEL?

Monday. Tonnes of sweets, a mountain of cake and two parties later for my baby boy, I am sitting on the spinning bike wondering how my diet went so wrong in the last few days. That aside, we had a great karate themed party on Saturday, Jax was beaming from ear to ear and was so happy to have his friends celebrate with him.   We also had a great party entertainer who made Jax feel very special all day long. He made his friends tickle him when he wasn't smiling for a second, he chose him first for all the games, he brought him on stage multiple times and made Jax the centre of all his entertainment acts. Jax couldn't stop taking about him all weekend. I sat and thought, this entertainer has stamped a lasting impression on a little 6 year old boy in just two hours. What he do? He made Jax feel special with little effort because that is what he does. So the big question is  HOW DO YOU MAKE PEOPLE FEEL? I am not asking if you go around trying to please people just to make them feel special. No. What I am asking is when you go about your day, do you think of your actions in terms of  - will it make the other person feel good or bad? I use the word "feel" because although we have little control of how another person feels, we have a general idea. Action and consequences often come to mind.  Are my actions going to affect a person positively or negatively? I love this Buddhist prayer that I say before leaving the house for the day "As I go out,  may I not cause anyone hurt and pain" This is powerful because pain causes more pain. A person who has a terrible commute because they had an argument with someone with a rotten attitude, will unconsciously transfer this hurt to work colleagues or family members. It is a snowball effect guys. As we start a new week, please be conscious of other people's feelings. A nasty person has gone through things that have made them that way, trust me when I say it has  NOTHING to do with you, the attitude came long before you, shake it off and move on, no one gets a medal for winning an argument or speaking 235 words a minute. I am feeling very reflective this time of the year as is typical when my birthday is round the corner whoop! whoop!! Watch this space. About this outfit  Coat- TK Maxx similar here  Jeans- New look similar here  Boots Ego.co.uk here  Have a lovely week guys. Until next time  Buttercups.  

“Be my BFF”

Drop your details to receive my updates!